Monday, May 30, 2005

Heart of Worship

when the music fades and all is stripped away
and i simply come
longing just to bring something that's of worth
that will bless Your heart

i'll bring You more than a song
for a song in itself
is not what You have required
You search much deeper within
through the way things appear
You're looking into my heart

i'm coming back to the heart of worship
and it's all about You
all about You, Jesus
i'm sorry, Lord, for the things i've made it
when it's all about You
All about You, Jesus

King of endless worth, no one could express
how much You deserve
though i'm weak and poor, all i have is Yours
every single breath...

Sunday, May 29, 2005

actually i dont see much of a great deal of me reading the da vinci code. everyone's making such a big fuss over me reading that darn book. fancy contradicting with the bible eh...i shall see how much you can say you darn bloody *toot* thing. haha, im sorry but yeah, im pretty pissed with all those 'naggings' i must say. "evan stop reading that thing! you're too young and innocent for it!" alrights, i myself know that im not very old but i dont like it when one looks down on another when it comes to looking at thy age. God says 'Let no one despise your youth'. i myself admit i do despise other's youth. but that is when they refuse to work. innocent? you think im that silly to go believe in the crap of a fool rubbish! i believe that im strong enough spiritually to not be affected. "evan you this kind of person very easily influenced one lor" alrights, i admit that that is true but hey, God will watch over me right...hehehe. pray hard for me and i believe that i'd be fine my dears. i must say, until someone gives me a perfectly fine explaination im going to read that darn book you guys are talking about. maybe i'd be inspired to write a codebreaker for it too. haha. i know i know, im a rebelious lil toot but hey, we're born like that right. im sorry and i sincerely seek for your forgiveness. hehehe.

Monday, May 23, 2005

i trusted you with all i had
i trusted you with all my life

why did you have to betray that trust
why did you have to...

i thought my secrets could be kept safe with you
i thought you were the one i could trust
to confide into

because of this i dont know who to trust
i dont know who is worthy of my trust

life was depressing then when i could trust no one
till i found you

things are working out really well
our friendship
my depression

but no, you had to spoil it
what am i to do but to let you go

you were my true friend
at least i thought you were
but now i dont think so
this is the end of the line
the end of the line between the two of us
i want no more to do with you

good bye...

Monday, May 02, 2005

public holidays are the worst things one can expect
especially when you're ill and you have a bunch of losers for a family
AND you have a loser friend who blames you for his doings. cool.

spent my entire day coughing and vomiting
mugging and mugging
eating and tv are of course included
comp's be occupied with mum and her work
dad's keeping a good watch on all muggers in the family
eye's tearing like mad each time i sneeze and cough
lungs aching and throat bursting
all the heat in my body is driving me nuts
have been sloshing myself with every drop of cold water i can find in the house

oh man the day's really bad
at least i had some joy in teasing people
until that particular person decided that he would tease himself himself

ah fine...
i got a scolding for just adding people into the conver
and yeah,
in a split second i have become 'evanpay the ultimate loser of the year'
wow. thanks so much man.
whatever...

must you pick this time to piss me off
right after i was going to congratulate myself for finishing a bottle of cough syrup in just 2days
for finish preparing for my offering message and for mugging for at least 4-5 hours
you think only your day's been bad?
mine's as bad
just look at those 2beads struggling to fight against sleep
my, do they look bad. all bloody and stuff
my skin peeling from all the wiping of nose and my hair always in a mess

coughed out blood in the morning
looks like im dying at this young age
hopefully i still can live for another 10days before i die
by then i'd finally be officially a teenager

cough's coming back and throat's tearing apart
i should get back to rest....

Sunday, May 01, 2005

cough's not getting any better
in fact it's getting worse
oh Lord i know i deserve this punishment but please
aint it enough...
1 whole week of cough and sorethroat
what's coming on next
coughing out blood then admitted into the hospital
can we make a new deal...
forget about that lousy one
it's just pulling me further and further away from you

if i can lead a lie free week
you take it all back...
i'll make sure i do my best
the pain's killing me
all the vomitting and stuff...
im feeling really ill
sick and tired

heal me wont you.